life and puppies

I like to think I’m open to change, but I don’t think I really am. I mean, yes, I’d like to see the big bankers prosecuted, I’d like to see the crazy money out of politics and I’d like to fully fund our public schools. Those are changes I can get behind, that I’d celebrate, that don’t scare me in the least. As for change closer to home, though? It’s hard. For example…

We are finally going to be able to send Bear to a day care that doesn’t have us driving miles in the wrong direction from work. We are going to be able to spend more time with Bear, less time in the car, and less time stressed about, well, time. We are going to be able to send her somewhere with an excellent reputation, unbelievably low turnover, blocks from our office, and competitively priced. It’s a non-profit center that’s been around since before I was born that is beloved by parents and kids alike. We’re really lucky.

So what’s the problem? It’s change. And I’m scared. And I’m emotional. And I’m worried. I know it’ll be fine. Bear will eventually love it, I’ll eventually love it, and – I hope – the teachers will come to love Bear. But right now? Right now we have a great, safe, loving place to send our daughter. When we first started sending her there, she couldn’t crawl. She couldn’t sit up on her own. Now, she walks into the place like she owns it. With a smile on her face and a confidence in her step. She is greeted with hugs and kisses and giggles. She is loved right where she is. And it’s very hard for me to willingly say goodbye to that. At least hard for me to do without shedding a few tears.