life and puppies

It’s been awhile since I’ve felt the need to skewer a big company on this puny blog. I hadn’t really had much to complain about. Charter, while performing anemically at times and costing too much, was being relatively straightforward with us. We’ve successfully avoided a Hyatt since 2010. We sold a condo and bought a house with little argument in doing both. I’ve bought myriad new things for the house and those things have been delivered in a timely manner, and in tact. And I’ve also been charged correctly for them! Well, things changed this weekend, my friends.

I’m back to complain!

First up: IKEA. Now, as you know, I’m generally a big fan of the large blue Swedish store. I mean, how can you not be? Well, I’ll tell you how. You have your good friend pick you up a Besta Burs, which you already have one of, on her way back from Chicago a couple of weeks ago. Then you let it sit in your house, unopened, for weeks, but you let your new puppy chew on the box from time to time. Next step? You decide to put it together on Saturday with help from your two-year old. Things go swimmingly until you reach step 10. The piece of wood required for step 10 does not exist in your home. Instead, there is a piece of wood with no holes in it. You quickly realize that a large piece of wood with no holes has no business coming from Ikea. How on Earth would you attach it to anything?! Oy. So, then you decide to call the customer service number that isn’t so easy to find on the company’s website. 20 minutes later, you’re still waiting for a live person. When one finally comes on, you’re told you’re out of luck if you don’t have the receipt and, even if your friend still has the receipt (which she does because she’s awesome), you need to return the product to the store. What the what? I have to drive over two hours each way to get the product that should have been right the first time. You won’t send me the right part? This is ridiculous. I ask to speak to someone else. I am put on hold again. While on hold, I ask AO about the possibility of drilling our own holes. He thinks it’s possible. I hang up after thirty minutes on the phone. Annoying.

Second place: West Elm. Normally, I am a big fan of the midcentury-modernesque Pottery Barn counterpart. But not today! At the end of October, I decided to pull the trigger and order a new chandelier for the dining room. The one that I had bought from Barnlight Electric is cute, but it’s more of a task light than a dining room light. We decided it would work better over the sink in the kitchen. So, the quest for a new light began. My mom and Molly and I went to Madison Lighting, but nothing quite struck me. We went to Pottery Barn with the same result. I couldn’t stop seeing chandeliers everywhere. I became obsessed with light. I looked online at the usual suspects: Crate & Barrel, CB2, Overstock, All Modern, Joss & Main, One Kings Lane, Rejuvenation. I kept meaning to stop into Rubin’s, but I also kept forgetting. Finally, I settled on one from West Elm. I really loved it and it came with free shipping. Hooray! So, I clicked and clicked until enough clicking confirmed I had ordered it. Only it wasn’t supposed to arrive until the end of November. No problem, I thought, it’ll still be here in time for Thanksgiving and my family will all be able to see how truly talented I am at buying chandeliers. All that was left to do was wait.

Wait.

Wait.

Wait.

Today I decided I needed to check to see which day this week it would be arriving. I went to my saved email and saw that the original email said November 26. Not ideal, but workable. I clicked through to the website to see if there was an update. Well, was there? There was! Oh, it’s not scheduled to ship until FEBRUARY!!! February!!! I’m. So. Annoyed. I get that things happen and that the manufacturer must have estimated the lead time incorrectly. Fine. But why did West Elm not tell me? Why did they not send me an update when I’m sitting here thinking my Thanksgiving lighting situation is all under control?! I know, I know: First World Problems. I understand that this is not Ebola or ISIS or world hunger or cancer. I do. But I’m annoyed.

And I’m thinking of walking to Rubin’s at lunch.